Guest Post: heatherlydee

My second guest poster (of the three mentioned here) is Heather from heatherlydee. She writes one of my favorite blogs. I always seem to feel encouraged or reminded to rely on God after reading her thoughts. Moreover, she is good about also giving you practical/tangible ways to put that encouragment into action. She is a single girl with a big faith (and pretty great taste in music if you ask me).

I try my best to encourage my single friends where they are as a place I've been and from a place they'll be someday, but at the end of the day my voice can only go so far. I've passed Heather's blog along to my single friends before as an encouraging single Christian lady and I am so excited to have her voice on my blog representing that perspective. 

_______________________________________________

I am Heather from heatherlydee I often write about my adventures of life, faith and being a single woman. Thank you to Noelle for allowing me to share my story with all of you.

I think it’s great that no matter what stages we are in life, we can come together as women, share, empathize and learn from each other. When Noelle asked me to share about relying on God as a single adult woman, I didn’t know where to begin. I could fill books and books with mistakes made and lessons learned as I have a lot of experience being single.

I have never really had a boyfriend. Unless you count the brief time in high school that my best guy friend and I wrote each other emails everyday. I didn’t have my first kiss until I was 19. I’ve only been on a couple dates…I guess they were dates. He bought me food. That counts, right?

I am a 26 year old woman and I am single. Not attached. No significant other. No ring on it. Honestly, I am okay with that. I DO want a relationship. I DO want to be married. But I don’t want it bad enough to lower my standards and settle, instead of waiting for God’s best for me. 

(Source: nice.etsy.com)

One of my favorite quotes on this topic is by Marian Jordan, “Marriage doesn’t make you happy. It just makes you married.”  If you are waiting for a relationship to fix all your problems and make life perfect you are in for a rude awakening. Jerry Maguire had it wrong; no one person is going to complete you. Only in a relationship with Christ can we be made whole and even then we are still broken, sinful people who make mistakes.

Is it hard to trust in God when it seems like EVERYONE except me is dating, engaged or married? Of course it is! I struggle with this more than I would care it admit, but ultimately I have faith in God and His plan for my life. When I’m down and out, heartbroken and crying in my room because the guy I care about doesn’t feel the same way about me, I go back to what I know to be true. God has an excellent track record. He has NEVER let me down. He has NEVER left me alone. He has ALWAYS provided for me. He has ALWAYS loved me. So even though things are difficult in the moment, I believe, without a doubt, that God’s plan for my life is better than anything I could imagine for myself. Remember, sometimes rejection is God’s protection.

(Source: youcantbeserious.com.au)

During my time of singleness, what I’m NOT doing is:

-Waiting alone in my clock tower for my prince to come.

-Going out to bars to meet guys.

-Listening to Satan’s lies that I’m not good enough or that something is wrong with me.

-Allowing the idea of a relationship to become an idol.

-Looking to spending money, food, sex, drugs, etc to fill my heart.

During my time of singleness, what I AM doing is:

-Setting goals for myself. Chasing dreams. Going on adventures. Becoming complete by myself.

-Considering the qualities that I think are important for a mate.

-Praying for my future husband.

-Reading books about singleness, marriage and relationships from a Christian perspective. (Email me if you want book suggestions-I’ve read them all.)

- Waiting with anticipation and patience for my future husband.

So this is my wisdom/encouragement/direction to any of you who are in the single ladies club with me: take this time to learn who you are, make mistakes and learn lessons, go on adventures and have fun! Above all, put God at the center of your life and seek Him. You are a child of God and that really is enough.